An Introvert’s Guide To Going Out More

LOVE OR MONEY by Emily Tong wearing red smocked mini dress and espadrilles in LA

Most people tend to misunderstand what an introvert/extrovert actually is. I’ve taken many a personality test in my day (thanks, college), and I’m almost as introverted as they come. You might immediately assume that I’m super shy, but that’s actually not the case. Introversion vs. extroversion is where you gain your energy from, and not actually how outgoing you may or may not be. Introverts replenish their energy stores by spending time alone (hello face masks and Netflix), while extroverts gain energy from being around others. You can actually be a shy extrovert, and an outgoing introvert! Crazy, I know.

Being a natural introvert, I’ve become even moreso as I’ve gotten a bit older, and often gladly forego a night out with my friends for relaxing activities such as reading, catching up on laundry, organizing my closet and the like. But come on – it’s embarrassing how much I enjoy these activities, and I often have to remind myself that I’m still a twentysomething with awesome friends, no kids, and an array of fun social opportunities to participate in, especially here in LA.

If you’re an introvert like me (especially in your late 20’s/early 30’s with a lot of shit going on in your life), going out can feel like a task that you need 3-5 days to mentally prepare for. The days of staying out till 4am, bouncing out of bed with no hangover and having enough energy to go to class are long gone. But, it doesn’t mean that you’re an old lady who should be home knitting by 7pm. Going out – more literally just getting out of your house and socializing with other humans, is important. It gives you a chance to nurture your friendships, make new connections, and cut loose a bit from the daily grind. Read below for 5 tips for my fellow introverts on how to be more motivated to go out.

Dress | & Other Stories

Leather Jacket | Zara (similar here)

Espadrilles | & Other Stories

Bag | Zara (similar here)

Earrings | NA-KD

LOVE OR MONEY by Emily Tong wearing red smocked mini dress and espadrilles in LA
LOVE OR MONEY by Emily Tong wearing red smocked mini dress and espadrilles in LA
LOVE OR MONEY by Emily Tong wearing red smocked mini dress and espadrilles in LA
LOVE OR MONEY by Emily Tong wearing red smocked mini dress and espadrilles in LA
LOVE OR MONEY by Emily Tong wearing red smocked mini dress and espadrilles in LA
LOVE OR MONEY by Emily Tong wearing red smocked mini dress and espadrilles in LA
LOVE OR MONEY by Emily Tong wearing red smocked mini dress and espadrilles in LA
LOVE OR MONEY by Emily Tong wearing red smocked mini dress and espadrilles in LA
LOVE OR MONEY by Emily Tong wearing red smocked mini dress and espadrilles in LA

An Introvert’s Guide To Going Out More

1. Buy a new ‘night-out’ dress that gets you excited. Red is recommended, as it brings out your inner salsa dancer woman emoji. This one is literally made for grabbing cocktails. Wear something on the sexier side that you normally wouldn’t to make the most of your rare social appearances.

2. Just do it. Sometimes you have to force yourself. Give yourself a ‘going out’ quota per month, and schedule it in like you would anything else (to make it even more official, send cute e-vites to your girls). Going out doesn’t mean raging – it just means getting yourself dressed and out the door for a few hours. It’s important to feel like a sexy, grown ass woman sometimes. Have a drink dance a little, and stop taking life so seriously.

3. Go somewhere new. Rather than your regular watering holes, going somewhere you’ve never been ends up feeling more exciting and worth all the trouble in the end. Been hearing about a swanky new rooftop bar or cute dinner spot? Round up your girls, go forth and prosper.

4. But at the same time, be true to yourself. If you hate clubbing, then screw the club. Try something out of the box instead. Free jazz night at the LACMA and karaoke in Koreatown are on my list this summer. The point is just to get out, and be a human. Copious amounts of tequila shots are actually not required to have a good time.

5. Try to see the value in being more social. Even though you’d probably rather be home binge watching your latest addiction, here’s always a redeeming moment when you spend a night out with your friends. Whether you had the adventure of a lifetime or just cracked up together about something stupid, you got something positive out of it.

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